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Portrait of a Ginger Noblet

 Hot on the heels of yesterday’s doggie-themed blog, this morning I was summoned to the fence that separates our garden from the neighbours’ garden by calls of ‘Denise!’ and ‘Nell!’ The calls came from the neighbours’ two grandchildren who were visiting their grandparents. 

‘I have a present for you!’ declared the eldest, and through the fence, she passed me this:


A very lovely, and very orange landscape portrait of Nell! It’s even got her name on it in bold purple lettering, just in case I should have confused her with a Highland cow, for example, what with Nell being a very similar colour. Isn’t it wonderful?! 

Well! This was a marvellous gift and completely made me forget that just ten minutes previously I had nearly met my end in a car crash with a fecking eejit (as they say in Ireland) in a large SUV, who decided it was a jolly good idea to overtake a tractor on a blind bend on a not very wide part of the road, which meant I came face to face with him on MY side of the lane. It was a very close call, I can tell you and it was a good job I was travelling at a sedate pace. Any faster and, well, I don’t want to contemplate the outcome. 

Nell and I were returning from our morning canal walk, you see, and we were almost reduced to tarmac jam a few hundred yards from our front door. My life flashed before my eyes and my heart was still slamming against my chest wall as I pulled into the driveway. It was quite, quite horrible. BUT a surprise work of art turned my emotions to joy and delight, and all is well. The portrait has pride of place on the kitchen wall where the sight of it will make me smile. 

I’ve been cracking on with the second round of assignments for my diploma course. There are nine to complete by 20th April. I have completed one and rough-drafted another five so am ahead of the game, which is good. Today, I girded my loins to tackle assignment number four which was to take the form of a PowerPoint presentation exploring the historical and cultural links between medicine and spirituality. 

What you need to know is that I do NOT like doing PowerPoint presentations. Maybe it’s a side effect of having done them unto death when I was a teacher. Maybe it’s because they are complete FAFF. Or maybe it’s because I over-egg the presentation pudding because I can’t help but do all the fancy stuff to make them look pretty. Anyway, there I was at 11 a.m, giving myself a stern talking to. 

‘Just go and make a start,’ I said to myself. 

‘But it’s going to be such a faff,’ I whined back. 

‘Stop whinging and complaining,’ I said in response. ‘Just start it. You’ve only got between 12 and 20 slides to do. Even if you do two or three a day, you’ll have it done by next weekend and then we can all relax. You’ll have to do it at some point. Get on with it.’

‘Alright,’ I said, sticking out my bottom lip and scuffing my shoes against the floor like a recalcitrant teenager. 

I dragged myself upstairs to my writing room, got out my laptop and accumulated notes, opened a slide show template and took a deep breath. 

Reader, I finished it! I completed the WHOLE PowerPoint - 17 slides, no less! - and then I sent it off to my tutor because I NEVER want to see it again. I am sitting here grinning like the Cheshire Cat because I should have known that, once I get the bit between my teeth, I don’t stop until I’ve finished what I set out to do. It is one of my most satisfying personality traits and I often forget it is something I am good at, and which sometimes takes me by surprise. 

That means I have completed TWO assignments and have rough drafts of another five. Blimey, I’ve almost finished this term’s work. I hereby award myself a big tick and a gold star for doing so! 

Comments

Anonymous said…
What do you mean you ‘dragged yourself UP STAIRS to your writing room’? In my minds eye, granted rather faulty, given I have never been to chez ‘maison de Denise’ I thought your writing room was down stairs!?” Glad nothing more happened to you than a good scare although that is quite enough! Why would one overtake a tractor!? To be honest I hope the other party is having nightmares right now about what could have happened, for a long time.
KJ
Denise said…
KJ, I’m sorry to disillusion you regarding my writing room but it has always been upstairs! Sometimes I bring my laptop downstairs and write in the dining room but mostly I am up, surveying the kingdom from above! As for the dangerous driver, well, I hope he never thinks about overtaking on a blind bend in future. But then again, he might be one of those lunatics who has scant regard for other road users and expects others to get out of the way. Who knows?

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