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Deep Breath

 


The plumber visited yesterday and very efficiently sorted out the upstairs leak and fitted a new radiator in the kitchen. He said, ‘I’ll send you an invoice for payment,’ and I said, ‘I’ll pay it immediately,’ because that’s how I roll with bills I owe unless they are bills for big utility companies and the Inland Revenue, in which case I’ll defer payment until the very last minute. 

The invoice arrived this morning. I logged into my banking app (remember? The one I had to re-register a couple of days ago because Andy couldn’t register for the app without this happening, goodness knows why, because I think the excuse about it being a joint account is very spurious indeed) and went to the pay a bill section. It’s an easy way to pay a bill, and the bank likes you to use this method because it is so easy. They prefer you to use the app instead of online banking, and especially instead of trying to make transactions in branch when you might disturb their tea breaks and reading of ‘Hello’ magazine. 

Anyway, because the plumber was a new payee, I had to enter his bank details, which I did, tra la la la la, all going well so far, done this loads of times, no probs. And then I pressed the ‘Pay’ button, and immediately a little 🤚 popped up with the message ‘For your security, this feature won’t be available for a few days.’ Apparently, this is to protect me as ‘a new app user.’ On account of me being a moron? Who knows? 

‘Aaaaaargghhhhh!!!!’ said I. ‘I am NOT a new app user. You know jolly well I’m not a new app user. You MADE me re-register, you moron bankers. I’ve been using your stupid app for years.’

Of course, because Andy is genuinely a new app user he couldn’t pay the bill either. And I suppose we could have waited a few days BUT I had told the plumber I would pay straight away and if nothing else I am a woman who sticks to my word. 

Therefore, Andy logged into his online banking account. And, after having to input two security codes AND use his PINSentry machine AND his app (go figure) he paid the bill that way.

Oh, how I yearn for ye olden days when a bill was paper and you paid it with cash…sigh…

The other potential Event of Aaaarghhh that I am anticipating is the imminent changeover of our internet provider. Theoretically (ahahahahahahaha…ha!) it should go smoothly. We are paid up until 16th February with our old provider. The new provider says they will be taking over the connection on 8th February which gives us a good week of crossover betwixt and between the two. Nothing, I repeat NOTHING should go wrong. We should get a week’s refund from our old provider although given it is BT I doubt they’ll surrender without a fight. 

And I am telling you this just in case I vanish from the blog for a short period of time. If I do, it will be because of Circumstances Beyond My Control and the Stupid Internet. Just imagine me having a rant in the kitchen and comfort eating Eccles cakes because that’s exactly what I’ll be doing. 

On the plus side, the new kitchen radiator is chucking out way more heat than the old one! And I am thinking that this year could be the year I get back into the world of bee-keeping. 



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