National Day celebrations today focus mostly on food. It’s National String Cheese Day, for example....
This is string cheese. It is an abomination to cheese. Why would someone think to do THIS to cheese? In fact, I am willing to bet that this is NOT cheese. That it is something like recycled car tyres and plastic bags with 0.1% cheese added in order to appease the trade description people, then sprayed with gloss paint and marketed within an inch of its non-cheesy life as a fun way to eat cheese. It isn’t. Eat cheese properly, folks. I beg you. Cut from a block with a cheese knife and perched on a high quality cracker. Pickles optional.
It is also National Fried Rice Day...
Marginally better than string cheese by virtue of it being sprinkled with vegetables and proteined up with egg. But my experience of fried rice is one of extreme stickiness whereby I believe the last time I ate some, circa 2003, the result has been there is still residue attached to my large intestine. Why cook rice, then fry it? That can’t be good on a molecular level, can it?
National Punch Day next...
No, not the violent smack sort of punch much beloved of the boxing fraternity, but the drink punch. Be honest, you don’t know what’s in that bowl, do you? Not really. Okay, you can see the fruit, but the liquid? That could be ANYTHING. Probably is. I suspect people who present punch at a party do so only because it gives them an opportunity to empty the dregs of their drinks cabinet so they can have a good restock. For the sake of your eyesight, be cautious of the punch. That’s all I have to say. Other than punch bowls and their attached dinky cups and matching ladles are rather nice. But it is NOT National Punch Bowl Day.
And then we move onto National Pepperoni Pizza Day.
I made a pizza for Himself Lord Malarkey for dinner yesterday. Homemade pizza. Not that 87 ingredients shop bought crap. No pepperoni either, because it is vile stuff and nobody should eat it if they have a modicum of respect for their circulatory systems. No, my pizza had a base made from flour, yeast, salt, oil and water. A topping made from homemade tomato sauce with added onions, basil and peppers. Then topped with courgettes, more peppers, chicken up the meat eater’s end and mozzarella. It was magnificent.
And such was the enthusiasm and hurry with which Lord Malarkey attacked the eating of this pizza, his plate balanced on the arm of the sofa whilst watching TV, that the whole caboodle slipped and went base over apex onto the floor.
I tried not to think of the time and care I had lavished on the making of that pizza, because after all, accidents do happen. I thanked the Goddess of Housework that I’d cleaned the floor only that morning. And that it is a wood floor and not carpet.
Therefore, and pertinently, I shall end today’s post by announcing that today is also National Wife Appreciation Day, and...
Comments
KJ
Phew!
KJ