Sometimes you have to let ideas roll around your mind for a while - for days sometimes, but often weeks or even months in order to know you’ve made a decision that is right for you. Of course, sometimes ideas can be acted upon within days and turn out fine and dandy. After all, His Lordship Malarkey - Andy - and I decided within 10 days of meeting each other that we would get married and we’ve been together for over 18 years now. Decision made, job done! However, sometimes you have to be prepared to reassess and change your mind about what you believe to be a final decision. You have to do this in order to move forward.
It has been almost 7 months since I left teaching for good. When I left my last permanent teaching job, which was 10 months ago, I was certain I was going to train to be a civil celebrant. I researched courses, read books, talked earnestly to people ‘in the know’, and even had a go at helping a friend through a funeral. My, don’t some families argue when someone has died? So complicated. Much unkindness, suspicion, and one sided storytelling was released by that death. A warning shot across my bows? Maybe.
But after a while of rolling the idea around my head, visualising myself in that line of work, listening to so many people telling me how good I would be at it, I decided that no. It was not right. And I felt unsettled, backtracking on this decision, but my instinct was strong. Celebrancy was not to be my pathway.
So during a short period of supply teaching, when I almost allowed myself to be pulled back into a permanent contract (now THAT was a bold ‘No thanks’ decision I made. Took about ten minutes thought, that one) I considered training to be a counsellor. Much in demand these days, and I already had relevant skills. Again, I researched, read, even did lots of preparation exercises. I learned a lot more about myself from those exercises, I can tell you! I even got as far as enrolling myself onto a taster course at the local college. I was going to be a discount card carrying student again.
But after a while of rolling the idea around my head, visualising myself in that line of work, I decided that no. It was not right. This time I didn’t feel so unsettled, backtracking on this decision. Because I suddenly realised that whilst I perceived I was going ‘backwards’ I was, in fact, going forwards! I was climbing personal obstacles. I was breaking thought barriers. And finally I was honest enough with myself to say that the only two things I really love doing in this world are writing and making things. Preferably with a needle and thread. (No, not the writing bit. Honestly, did that thought really flash though your mind?? Sheesh....)
So here I am, cracking on with writing a novel and publishing as I go. I have a one day a week job to keep me socialised and exercised. And this week I was accepted on a City and Guilds Stumpwork Embroidery Level 2 course because what I AM going to do is learn, develop and hone my art and then teach it to others! Introducing my new career, ladies and gentlemen...
Embroidery and Textile Artist and Writer!
The stumbling point with making this decision was that for ages (and I am talking years here) I could not see the value, beyond personal satisfaction, of sewing, embroidery, textile art. Or writing come to that. Which is mad, really, given I have a degree in Literature so am, by nature, a champion of the arts. But then I read this book...
...and it explained how important sewing is! Of course it is! The book travels around the world and across history and cultures. Thank you, Clare Hunter - you have opened the gate of progress and exploration for me. And thank you, blog readers who have sent such positive comments after each episode of ‘Clive and Min,’ and have made me realise that, yes, I can actually write! Good grief, I don’t know why I’ve taken so long to reach this point. What’s important, though, is that it has been reached, despite all the false starts.
I have a notebook of ideas and future business plans that is filling by the day. Since Monday, when I received my first course modules, I have been immersed in study again and I am as happy as a bunny in clover! I know where I am going now. I know my purpose.
This is my thread of life.
It has been almost 7 months since I left teaching for good. When I left my last permanent teaching job, which was 10 months ago, I was certain I was going to train to be a civil celebrant. I researched courses, read books, talked earnestly to people ‘in the know’, and even had a go at helping a friend through a funeral. My, don’t some families argue when someone has died? So complicated. Much unkindness, suspicion, and one sided storytelling was released by that death. A warning shot across my bows? Maybe.
But after a while of rolling the idea around my head, visualising myself in that line of work, listening to so many people telling me how good I would be at it, I decided that no. It was not right. And I felt unsettled, backtracking on this decision, but my instinct was strong. Celebrancy was not to be my pathway.
So during a short period of supply teaching, when I almost allowed myself to be pulled back into a permanent contract (now THAT was a bold ‘No thanks’ decision I made. Took about ten minutes thought, that one) I considered training to be a counsellor. Much in demand these days, and I already had relevant skills. Again, I researched, read, even did lots of preparation exercises. I learned a lot more about myself from those exercises, I can tell you! I even got as far as enrolling myself onto a taster course at the local college. I was going to be a discount card carrying student again.
But after a while of rolling the idea around my head, visualising myself in that line of work, I decided that no. It was not right. This time I didn’t feel so unsettled, backtracking on this decision. Because I suddenly realised that whilst I perceived I was going ‘backwards’ I was, in fact, going forwards! I was climbing personal obstacles. I was breaking thought barriers. And finally I was honest enough with myself to say that the only two things I really love doing in this world are writing and making things. Preferably with a needle and thread. (No, not the writing bit. Honestly, did that thought really flash though your mind?? Sheesh....)
So here I am, cracking on with writing a novel and publishing as I go. I have a one day a week job to keep me socialised and exercised. And this week I was accepted on a City and Guilds Stumpwork Embroidery Level 2 course because what I AM going to do is learn, develop and hone my art and then teach it to others! Introducing my new career, ladies and gentlemen...
Embroidery and Textile Artist and Writer!
The stumbling point with making this decision was that for ages (and I am talking years here) I could not see the value, beyond personal satisfaction, of sewing, embroidery, textile art. Or writing come to that. Which is mad, really, given I have a degree in Literature so am, by nature, a champion of the arts. But then I read this book...
...and it explained how important sewing is! Of course it is! The book travels around the world and across history and cultures. Thank you, Clare Hunter - you have opened the gate of progress and exploration for me. And thank you, blog readers who have sent such positive comments after each episode of ‘Clive and Min,’ and have made me realise that, yes, I can actually write! Good grief, I don’t know why I’ve taken so long to reach this point. What’s important, though, is that it has been reached, despite all the false starts.
I have a notebook of ideas and future business plans that is filling by the day. Since Monday, when I received my first course modules, I have been immersed in study again and I am as happy as a bunny in clover! I know where I am going now. I know my purpose.
This is my thread of life.
Comments
Best of luck in your adventures.