I'm still here! I have been reflecting how on earth I managed to fit in a full time job given that since I left teaching I have been so darned busy! I've been gardening, sewing, trying out new recipes - who knew hummus was so easy and instant and cheap to make rather than buy? I have been writing letters like they are going out of fashion to new penfriends in Sweden, Germany, Spain and the UK. I've been doing proper housework, by which I mean moving sofas and sweeping out the cat fur dust bunnies that lurk beneath and behind, and not just giving the floor a cursory brush around the edges so that everything in eyesight at least looks tidy. (Those of you who are now tutting and saying things like, 'Life is too short to spend time on housework,' well, you can jolly well hush. I get a huge amount of personal satisfaction knowing that if Her Maj the Queen were to turn up unexpectedly I would feel very happy to welcome her into my lovely clean and tidy home. Tidy home, happy mind - that's my motto. Along with 'Never buy a used car from Tony Blair,' and both maxims have served me well over the years.
So last week I had the Urge of Decorating come upon me. This was encouraged by the massive Floorboard of Sagginess that has developed in the bedroom of Lord Malarkey and myself. And as it is I who has to step over the darn thing when exiting the bed lest I end up halfway through the floor into the kitchen below a la 'The Money Pit' style (hilarious for others, but not for me), I suddenly decided that I was recovered enough from the last round of building and decorating works (the stairs and landing, and the oak flooring) to tackle one of the few remaining Damson Cottage Renovation Project jobs i.e decorate the main bedroom. My daughter finds this hilarious, that we have done everything else to the house and left our bedroom until last but it happened as it did and so last week I popped a 'Replace the Floor' job on MyBuilder and within 24 hours Kelly the Builder/Carpenter had arrived on his motorbike, talked me through the ins and outs of the job and explained he could do it next week because he was due to be laying a patio and the weather forecast gave rain.
Well, you know me and serendipitous opportunities. Of course, this did rather bring home the fact that now I DID have to commit to decorating the bedroom properly and I was flung briefly into a frenzy of panic internet searches for 'Victorian Country Cottage Bedroom' design ideas and almost succumbed to an exotic confection based on peacock feather colours. (Not white peacock though. I add this comment only because I know it will make Himself Malarkey laugh because it connects to a private in-joke from our courting days!) Of course, peacock feather colours are not country cottage style, although our next neighbour half a mile up the road DOES have an actual peacock which often sits in the middle of the road and one day is likely to become an ex-peacock if he continues this habit. But as they say in Poland, 'Not my circus, not my monkeys.' Only in Polish, not English.
I digress. I decided to let colour palettes and visions of the finished effect come to my mind organically i.e just pop up one day, in a mindful sort of way, because my life these days is all about mindfulness, don't you know? Besides, I could do nothing until Kelly the Builder/ Carpenter had finished and he was unsure whether the job would take one or two days because he wouldn't know the spacing of the support beams until he took up the squeaky saggy boards and 'had a butchers.' (Kelly is from 'dahn sarf' like me. Nice to have a tradesman turn up and not say, 'You's not from round these parts.') Anyway, after clearing the room of furniture yesterday, sleeping on a mattress on the floor last night (much to the confusion and delight of the cats who wanted to know where the underneath of the bed had gone but thanks for replacing it with a trampoline) I was up early this morning wielding the Stanley knife and removing the manky carpet ready for action stations.
The job of 'Replacing the Saggy Squeaky Boards' has morphed into 'Replacing the Saggy Squeaky Boards after Adding Extra Support Beams, Noggins, Removing Manky Skirting and Architrave and Making it All Solid Because That (says Kelly) is How I Like It.' We have also decided to insulate between the layers of floor for soundproofing purposes. Kelly has been working solidly since 9 this morning, like a man on a mission. Every now and then I am requested to attend so he can explain what is occurring. It has been VERY noisy. Like being at the dentists in the middle of M25 road works. But that new floor is going nowhere AND the new skirting and architrave will be a joy to decorate and infinitely preferable to the crumbling mess of plank and filler that was there before. It will, as Kelly says, bring the room into keeping with the rest of the cottage.
He has also given me a price for building two storage cupboards into the space by the front door. Another job ticked off the list. Apparently they will be built off site and then he'll just turn up and 'pop them in'. No noise. Bonus.
We are almost there folks! Friday will be our third year anniversary of arriving at Damson Cottage. I doubt the previous owners would recognise the place now.
So last week I had the Urge of Decorating come upon me. This was encouraged by the massive Floorboard of Sagginess that has developed in the bedroom of Lord Malarkey and myself. And as it is I who has to step over the darn thing when exiting the bed lest I end up halfway through the floor into the kitchen below a la 'The Money Pit' style (hilarious for others, but not for me), I suddenly decided that I was recovered enough from the last round of building and decorating works (the stairs and landing, and the oak flooring) to tackle one of the few remaining Damson Cottage Renovation Project jobs i.e decorate the main bedroom. My daughter finds this hilarious, that we have done everything else to the house and left our bedroom until last but it happened as it did and so last week I popped a 'Replace the Floor' job on MyBuilder and within 24 hours Kelly the Builder/Carpenter had arrived on his motorbike, talked me through the ins and outs of the job and explained he could do it next week because he was due to be laying a patio and the weather forecast gave rain.
Well, you know me and serendipitous opportunities. Of course, this did rather bring home the fact that now I DID have to commit to decorating the bedroom properly and I was flung briefly into a frenzy of panic internet searches for 'Victorian Country Cottage Bedroom' design ideas and almost succumbed to an exotic confection based on peacock feather colours. (Not white peacock though. I add this comment only because I know it will make Himself Malarkey laugh because it connects to a private in-joke from our courting days!) Of course, peacock feather colours are not country cottage style, although our next neighbour half a mile up the road DOES have an actual peacock which often sits in the middle of the road and one day is likely to become an ex-peacock if he continues this habit. But as they say in Poland, 'Not my circus, not my monkeys.' Only in Polish, not English.
I digress. I decided to let colour palettes and visions of the finished effect come to my mind organically i.e just pop up one day, in a mindful sort of way, because my life these days is all about mindfulness, don't you know? Besides, I could do nothing until Kelly the Builder/ Carpenter had finished and he was unsure whether the job would take one or two days because he wouldn't know the spacing of the support beams until he took up the squeaky saggy boards and 'had a butchers.' (Kelly is from 'dahn sarf' like me. Nice to have a tradesman turn up and not say, 'You's not from round these parts.') Anyway, after clearing the room of furniture yesterday, sleeping on a mattress on the floor last night (much to the confusion and delight of the cats who wanted to know where the underneath of the bed had gone but thanks for replacing it with a trampoline) I was up early this morning wielding the Stanley knife and removing the manky carpet ready for action stations.
The job of 'Replacing the Saggy Squeaky Boards' has morphed into 'Replacing the Saggy Squeaky Boards after Adding Extra Support Beams, Noggins, Removing Manky Skirting and Architrave and Making it All Solid Because That (says Kelly) is How I Like It.' We have also decided to insulate between the layers of floor for soundproofing purposes. Kelly has been working solidly since 9 this morning, like a man on a mission. Every now and then I am requested to attend so he can explain what is occurring. It has been VERY noisy. Like being at the dentists in the middle of M25 road works. But that new floor is going nowhere AND the new skirting and architrave will be a joy to decorate and infinitely preferable to the crumbling mess of plank and filler that was there before. It will, as Kelly says, bring the room into keeping with the rest of the cottage.
He has also given me a price for building two storage cupboards into the space by the front door. Another job ticked off the list. Apparently they will be built off site and then he'll just turn up and 'pop them in'. No noise. Bonus.
We are almost there folks! Friday will be our third year anniversary of arriving at Damson Cottage. I doubt the previous owners would recognise the place now.
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